10 things to NEVER do when trying to get pregnant
Today’s going to be a little bit different because I’m going to be talking about the 10 things that a fertility expert would never, ever do while trying to conceive. And many of these will actually surprise you. So let’s get started.
My name is Dr. Marc Sklar, also known as a fertility expert. And I’ve been working with couples for over 19 years through my online coaching programs and right here in San Diego at my clinic. And these tips, or not tips, depending on how you look at them that I’m going to talk about today are things that I’ve discussed in various ways over the last 19 years with the couples that I have supported. So I want to do it a little bit different today. I think this is going to be fun and really educational for all of you. So let’s get into it.
So I came up with this idea, because I saw my good friend and fertility coach and colleague, Aimee Raupp discuss the five things that she would never do as a fertility expert. I thought it would be a lot of fun and entertaining to do that here on YouTube for all of you. So we’re going to start and get into number one right now.
Number one, I would never, ever prioritize going, going, going, and doing, doing, doing versus resting and relaxing. That’s right. We all live in this fast-paced world of accomplishing more, doing more, and reaching for more. And sometimes you really just need to take a step back and find the time to rest, recover, and relax and rejuvenate. And that is something that most of you don’t do enough of, and finding the things that bring joy when you do those things. So if it’s just outside gardening, if it’s just hanging out reading a book, if it’s just going for a walk in nature or hanging out at the beach, those are the things that I would prioritize over accomplishing and doing. And that’s number one.
Number two is I would never forget to read the ingredients, whether it is food or drinks that I’m going to consume or something that I’m going to put onto my body on my skin. Either way, my body absorbs those things. So I would never, ever, ever ignore those ingredients because I want to make sure that you are putting the cleanest things into your body and on your body so that those toxins, those chemicals don’t impact your endocrine system and your fertility. And this is actually something that I’m actually teaching my kids right now. When they say, “Could I have these bag of chips?” I say, “Read the ingredients. If you don’t understand what’s inside of it, then the answer is going to be no.” We need to prioritize organic, grass-fed, pasture-raised, natural products for our skin and our body to make sure you stay healthy and your fertility is not compromised.
Number three, which is building on number two is I would never eat non-organic animal meat. That’s right. It’s compromised with all sorts of antibiotics and hormones and medication, and often it’s just not what it used to be. So I want to make sure that you prioritize the quality of the food that you’re putting into your body and that it is organic, grass-fed, wild, or pasture-raised. That is the most important when it comes to animal products.
Number four, which could be my favorite for all of you, is I would never just have intercourse in my fertile window or at ovulation. That’s right. So much of our intercourse and intimacy and sex is revolved around ovulation and it takes away how special that is for you both as a couple and how important it is for your relationship. So I want to make sure you get back to that, having intercourse more freely throughout the week, not just at ovulation throughout your month, whenever that desire comes for both of you. But I want to make sure that is so important for all of you and that you’re actually prioritizing that, and not just focusing on having intercourse when you need to for ovulation because your relationship is just as important now as it was before, and as it will be in the future when you have children. And it starts with regular, healthy intercourse.
Number five, I would never do intense workouts or start training for a marathon or something that extreme while you’re trying to conceive. Now is the time to nourish your body and support your body, and maybe even take a step back from the intensity of the workouts. And I know many of you are saying, “But it relieves my stress and it’s part of who I am and it’s what I do,” and I understand that and we need to find a different way to satisfy that need. It doesn’t mean you can’t exercise, but we shouldn’t be doing it in the same veracity as we have been in the past. And I want to make sure that you kind of take a step back from all of that. And again, this comes back to resting and relaxing and giving your body a time to rest and relax and not stressing it with the intensity of extreme exercise.
Number six, I would never start trying or continue trying without testing. I want answers. I want to know as much information as I can about my body, my health, and my fertility. And I want the same thing for all of you. And it starts with testing, not guessing. If you don’t have a complete panel, if you haven’t dove deep into your labs to get a good firm understanding for what’s going on inside your body and with your reproductive system, then we need to take a step back and go there before we continue to guess and not have a plan that’s customized to us based on what our body is telling us it needs.
Number seven could be my favorite. I would never assume that I need IVF just because of my age. I know that this gets talked about all the time, but your age is just the one thing that we cannot change at all. And so we need to focus on the things we do have impact over, that we can support and can change. And I have seen women get pregnant at all sorts of ages, well into their 40s. So it is possible, but we need to give the body what it needs and focusing on your age is not going to do that. Now, if you do want to do IVF, that’s fine, but it shouldn’t be because someone told you you’re too old or that’s what you need because your age is X. It should be because you want to, because you feel like it’s time for you to move in that direction.
The next one, number eight is I would never keep trying month after month after month without doing a semen analysis. I just had a conversation with someone this week and they’ve been trying for years, and I said, “Well, do you have a semen analysis? Does your husband have a semen analysis?” And she said, “No, he hasn’t.” So my response back was, “That has to be the next thing that you do, that we can’t support you without that.” We need to know what the sperm are doing, how healthy they are and 40% to 50% of all fertility issues are male factor. So have a semen analysis done now. Even if years ago it was healthy, do it again and double-check.
Number nine, I would never assume that your fertility issues are because of egg quality, even if that’s what someone has told you, even if that’s what one of the fertility clinics has told you. I see about 50% of the couples that come to work with me in my program, who we look at their hormones, we evaluate their case in detail, they are treating and assessing their fertility like it’s an egg quality issue. And I look at all of their labs and their medical reports, and guess what? It’s not. It’s not.
So your fertility doesn’t always have to be about egg quality. There are a lot of other issues, which I’ve discussed on many videos that can be impacting your fertility and your reproductive function besides egg quality. So don’t assume that all fertility issues are egg quality issues. And even if the IVF clinic tells you that’s what it is, let’s get a second opinion because it’s not usually the case.
And number 10, possibly the most important for all of you. I would never, ever, ever lose hope in your ability to conceive. You can do this. I know you can. I believe in you. Don’t let all the negative talk that someone has told you or all the things you’ve maybe read online impact your belief in your ability. Continue to believe in yourself, in your reproductive function and restore the hope that you can do this. I believe in you, and if you need a little bit of my hope to believe in yourself, then take it from me. I know you can do this and I want you to believe in yourself.
What, “I would never…” Would you add to my list? What was I missing that you think should be included into the, “I would never if I was trying,” list that I just gave? I want to hear from all of you. Comment below and let me know. If you’ve been trying for too long and you want more support, if you don’t know where to turn or how to interpret your labs or these, “What I would never do,” speak to you and you feel like you need a little bit more support, then I want to invite you to apply to join my Hope Fertility Coaching Program, where we get to support you and help you create a customized plan to help you get pregnant. So if you want to do that, then I want to invite you to apply by using the link in the description below.
And one more thing before we go. If you feel like you’ve been wasting time searching for supplements, don’t know what products to buy, what’s really good for you for tracking your ovulation and what you really could use to find out more about yourself and how you can move forward on your fertility journey, then I’ve created a free fertility guide to support you. It has all the tools that you need and all the resources that I recommend that I have researched and approved myself. If you want that free resource, just use the link in the description below.
If you like this video, then give me a thumbs up. If you’re not already a subscriber to my YouTube channel, then you need to be, so hit that bell to subscribe and get notified when I put out a new video for all of you. And again, I want to invite you to comment below and let me know if you have any questions about your fertility that I can help support you with. Until the next video, stay fertile.